It is time for the annual club dinner which has run every year since 1889, except of course during the war years and once in 1983 due to the then Captain’s gout. Terrible thing gout.

But the club captain is aware that members are in crisis. That’s why this year's theme will be ‘The Greatest Off The Century’. Yes, the cost of living is on the up. Its not the fault of the bank of England for printing lots of money. Let's not however mention the Bank of England. That would be crass. The Bank of England. Its almost Christmas, so we'll be drinking claret spanning six decades. And it will be the worst vintage of every decade. The hidden phlegms.

Had it not been for them and some other unforeseen global circumstances, the plan was to do a vertical tasting of Domaine Romanee Conti’s Romanne Conti. Instead we shall be celebrating the droughts and plagues of the last half century ending with the famously appalling 2013, of which Jancis Robinson wrote in her usual forgiving style ‘ 2013 has been one of the hardest vintages, or perhaps even the most complicated, in the last 30 years. The disastrous spring set the tone for the year’.

I’m hoping the wine will be inspiring and that you bring some uncompromising, cynical assessments of the current near apocalyptic situation we find ourselves in and Santa hats please.

I’d like to ask for a small donation of £2,000 per head for the dinner, to help the clubs coffers through these difficult times.

(Prices are in Egyptian pounds. The club has moved its funds overseas in light of the latest inflation figures from the unspeakable)

Sparkles from 7pm.

Dinner supper or tea?

Up your irons with glee,

Its time for the CCCCC.

Club Captain Frazer